21.07.2013 12:36

Quotes from A Touch of Trolls by Year Five

Remember that awesome year 5 class that I keep banging on about? They've put together a 'brainless, gruesome and disgusting' short story collection called 'A Touch of Trolls'. Here are some of my favourite quotes from the book.

Rufus tiptoed into the fish-smelling, bogey-covered, troll-smothered cave, only to find Gunkfreak wide-awake, with two of his horrific fingers, up two of his horrific nostrils!

- Lucy

"Oh farb!" murmured Bruno. "I mean oh bother ..."

- Daisy

"Hi Betty! Hi Belinda! Why are you licking the pole?"

"It's a pole? I thought it was an ice cream. Betty told me to do it!"

- Harry

He smelt so bad that flies wouldn't even go near him or they would faint.

- Ethan

"Yarb," agreed Bruno. In his excitement he had almost forgotten that his new best friends would end up as girl gravy and boy burger if they were caught by troll security trying to get into the concert.

- Megan

They were offered eyeball canap├ęs as they waited for the concert to start.

- Josh

Polly was busy doing her hair and putting on perfume. Rufus was busy spraying Lynx everywhere and chocking everyone.

- Kieron

Past the Muckygush, through the Fusty Forest lies a pitch-black cave! In that cave was a troll called Smuglewart, chewing on a little schoolgirl.

- Jaden

"As a starter, toothpaste soup, flavoured with mossy earwax and juicy snot. For main, mouldy dog treats, frogspawn, crunchy beetle crisps, and slug chips battered in bogeys and coated in saliva gravy. And finally, dessert!" she finished with a flourish, pointing at a plate of what seemed to be chocolate chip cookies covered in white cream. "Rabbit droppings with squished maggot cream!"

- Penny

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A children's novel by Rosen Trevithick
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Keep Calm and Say Yarb ~ Make Boglewax Not War

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